Teah - Lyrics


in & out

slowly we fade in and out
nothing really to care about
think we're all lost by this time
looking for something
there's nothing to find

it's hard to think
that this was me
and it's hard to think
this was reality

each day's an eternity
we're just fighting to be free
think we got the right idea here
but we're not going anywhere

know there's more
than christianity
think we'll find a philosophy
if we just break
through these doors
so we'll keep fighting this war

know there's more
than what we see
so we'll trip out of this reality
movin' rhythmically
we think we found God
next morning that's
not what we saw

it's hard to think
that this was me
and it's hard to think
this was reality

chris sterns- bongos
matt ahearn - hand drum
sonny macatulo - bass
teah - guitars & vocals




thursday maybe friday

on a thursday perhaps
pine street is damp
gonna get some flowers wrapped in black
i will meet you at the café
i never thought i would
see you here again
and i'll tell you it is quite a nice surprise
cuz i been playing sophisticated
it is no fun refresh me on being young
i've been living a hateful life
it is no fun refresh me on being in love

warm your hands with the coffee cup
a smile and a laugh and i look up

i am not as strong as i seem
and i am not as weak as you see me
truthfully i am in between
though sometimes i play the extreme
sometimes it is necessary
and i'll be yours if you'll let me be both
i'm all yours if you'll let me be free
cuz i'm not all superwomyn
i'm human too

on 10 to volunteer park i'll meet you there
we'll laugh and play like children like
the old days the old days weren't they glorious
and you say you've got nothing left
to talk about with me now i think that's funny
cuz i wanna know everything you do now
i've been away so long now
i want that sunny day
walking through the market holding your hand
even though i've been so far away i changed
and you changed
you're still on my mind you're still with me
i just wish you were brave enough to face me

warm your hands with the coffee cup
a smile and a laugh and i look up

teah - guitars & vocals



the clinic

sitting in the clinic
on the edge in between
all is good in the clinic
where babies die
and womyn cry
where babies die
and womyn cry

sitting in the clinic
on the edge in between
all is good in the clinic

there he sits his head
buried in a magazine
so beautiful and
so numb so numb to my pain
numb to everything
may as well not be here
to fight our battle
our battle but my body

and i'm sitting

did i tell you
that my baby had died
you smile well i guess there's
nothing left to say about that
so i'm sitting in the clinic
on the edge in between
all is good in the clinic
my baby died and i won't cry
where babies die
and womyn cry

adam - lead guitar
emo - guitars
sonny - bass
kevin - drums
teah - vocals




ugly girl

i am an ugly girl
i am not what you wanted
i have to fight for my respect now
i have to fight
to keep my name straight and
i am an ugly girl
you cannot take me home tonight
and i have ugly insides
you cannot seduce me tonight

and everyone
has heard different things
and everyone has different
connotations on my name
i have to fight for my respect now
and i have to fight
to keep my name straight
i want my self back
i want to be big again
fuck you go ahead and laugh
if you do so please
yes i do think that
i could hate you

and i am an ugly girl
and i am sick of this soap opera
i am an ugly girl
and i am sick of jelly smiles
and they say
she really is a lovely girl
they say oh isn't she
a lovely girl

rain rain my blood is grey
i am individually curled
and wrapped underneath
your black castle window
and you are as ugly as me
but you have beauty
and i have beauty

teah - guitars & vocals


chaotic dance

one more set of moments, hours fly by
and one more pack of cigarettes
just once more
maybe we'll get there
grinning vacantly
and one more set of words yeah
one more pass my way
one more man says hey baby
i am sorry but you just don't have
what i'm looking for
and this is my habit
right here in my pocket

and there's a heaven maybe
we are all so sure
how'd we get so sure anyway

one more set of words
one more pass my way
and one more man says hey babe
and one more bullshit line
i am sorry, well no not really
i am sorry, actually i have lied
you just don't have what i am looking for
and this is my heaven
right here in my pocket

one more evening in this room
one more silent argument
nothing sour from the fountain of fire
desire is the enemy
and one more chaotic dance
flesh in the fountain of fire
one more chaotic dance
we are the dance
dear we ate the chaos
and this is my heaven
right here in my pocket

adam - lead guitar
emo - guitars
sonny - bass
teah - vocals





i need to be rocked

some times i feel like a baby
and that's when i need to be rocked
today i didn't feel like superwomyn
and i didn't feel like i could talk

so i go on more than willing like
the little girl i can be some times
you went on almost unfazed i guess
its the way you are all the time

i yeah i yeah need to be rocked

you know it's funny
the way it goes but it hurts
so much so much so many times
but you know sometimes it's
so good i can't help but
thinking that we'llnever say goodbye

emo - bass
teah - vocals & guitar




scattered

your actions tell me you care none
very rarely i feel you care some
someone told me you were crazy
i don't believe it you amaze me
somewhere somehow
i saw your soul there
wait i'm blind now
i'm not worthy

alone alone now
where are you hiding
someone hold me while i'm crying
sometime somehow i saw your effort
how'd it get away
everything is different
believe it or not i still miss you
your affection is a virtue
ambivalence is my friend now
where do we all go

it was a game i am sure now
the joke's on me
you're with her now
tryin' me out i didn't fit you
its time to move on to the next fool
i look at her and i can see it
i don't want to play with me yet
i think i'm stronger i know for a fact
why don't i end this no good act
ambivalence is my friend now
where do we all go

adam and emo - guitars
sonny - bass
kevin - drums
teah - guitar & vocals





decided to move on

in the morning i listened
for your telephone call
in the afternoon i waited
by the door for you
and you are such a big man now
you can't even be my friend
i suppose you'll take off in this world
you'll take off and forget about me
and i suppose i'll take off too but
i won't forget about you
no i won't forget about you
no i won't forget about you

really i am sorry but i won't
let it be a burden forever
really i am sorry but i won't
hold this guilt forever
really i am sorry but i will not
be your mother

in the evening i returned home
fiddled my guitar and drank a glass
thought for a while and
decided to move on
i'd guess that you are in
some obscure corner
getting high with your friends
so much thinking and
so much talking but
so little doing and
that's a let down

and i suppose its a bit of a let down
cuz you think i'm not
such a bitch anymore
and i suppose its a bit of a let down
cuz you think i'm not
so loud anymore
but you don't even know
the whole story

teah - guitars & vocals




none of your business

i need never to say a word to you
cuz you just looked at me
and i can never change what you see
i never thought myself to be open book
but you seem to think
that you know me
and now i see that you
cannot bring yourself
to smile at me
there are people in this town
whom i would entrust nothing to
but they seem to know
a few things about me
i guess they got it down the line
i guess they heard it
through the grapevine
though it's really
none of your business
no it's really none of your interest

teah - drums, guitars & vocals




retrospect

i try my hardest to think back
but i can't deal with the pain
i cannot see your smile
i cannot see your face anymore
some will interpret
this as a love song
but love that's just
the part that is gone

ceiling crashes down on me
and i can't get up
i'm dwellin' in my
safe haven now
and i still can't get up
still can't get up

sometimes i wonder
was it all a bad dream
but i know it was reality
it was happening to me
i try to delete every
moment spent there
but i can't hide the hurt inside
no i can't hide the hurt inside
no i cannot fight the hurt inside
no i can't hide the hurt inside

ceiling crashes down on me
and i can't get up
i'm dwellin' in my
safe haven now
and i still can't get up


ceiling crashes down on me
and i can't get up
i'm dwellin' in my
safe haven now
i still can't get up
i still can't get up

teah - drums, guitars & vocals





killing freak

you think by now we'd have it figured out
you think by now that we'd be living happy healthy community
instead on the t.v. screen genocide hypocrisy killing freak

i am free five minutes of freedom then sucked out of the wilderness
into all the urban hell where i fell
and my head goes up while my body goes down
my brain cushioned by a game confusion is the name
who am i anyway i knew ... yesterday
going home i got lost along the way but there where i live is not my home

i used to see my life as just marking time until i was free
free from something so petty such as parental security
but now i find liberty right in the arms of my mommy
all the adults they look at me downright disgustingly they mutter who is she
i am nobody and i am you that's reality you cannot escape from it pleasantly

miles upon miles of trophy homes crowding the land
our brothers and sisters used to live and they have been
pushed farther and farther so rudely soon there will be nothing
next time you turn around you won't see a mountain with beautiful trees
instead you'll see a fatal overgrown community
only there's no communing in this community
and all the hippies will cry and all the yuppies will smile (repeat)
they'll smile at their brand new roads and their shopping malls
and i will cry cuz the lions will have died
and the only thing left will be house cats and dogs living pathetically
hopefully you will cry when you realize your life as you know it is a universal lie
hopefully you will cry when you realize religion as you know it is a universal lie

it's easy to get lost in my mind daydreaming of sage and sand
and the mountain green all the beautiful hippies all the beautiful hippies
and it's easy to lose track of time
especially these parts where the water flows freely
i visit this land and i can't help but fall in love with everything
it's like god i can't quite describe
but if i were to feel god it would probably feel like i did on those days
and now i'm flying over the mountain in this oversized bird
i say a silent goodbye to my sacred earth lover my earth lover who sets me free
and i will cry because the lions will have died
hopefully you will cry when you realize your life as you know it is a universal lie
hopefully you will cry when you realize religion as you know it is a universal lie

teah - guitars & vocals




too close

too close
to just yesterday
and today
you are not quite the same
let's face the fact
that indeed things
do change
but i will not
stand and watch you
fall apart
and i will not be your mother

  chorus
i'm going to stick it through
i'm going to make do
i'm going to tell you
i'm going to break you
and all the while i
wish you would
hold my (repeat)
hold my hand
i'm going to run from you
i'm going to cry for you
i'm going to kill you
i'm going to give birth to you
and all the while i will
hold your (repeat)
hold your hand

you are
so much you don't know
and i will do my part
the best i can
i know you will do your part
the best you can
but you must not
stand and watch me
fall apart
and you must not
be my father

  chorus

teah - guitars & vocals




kitty

i'm having a moment
yes you are the man of my dreams
but i do not live in a dream world
i live in this obscure reality
oh gee sorry that does not
fit in with your plans
actually i doubt you had
any plans

  chorus 1
no no stay back yea
you smell real nice
and you are pretty smooth
but right now I need something
something real

there are no means of apology
but go ahead and
say what you have to go ahead and
say what you have to
my ears are open i've no reply

  chorus 2
and this friend said
come out and play carefree
and when your fingers are sore
i will kiss them

and sorry i had to butcher this tree
but those kittens were baiting me
oh yes sorry i had to
butcher this tree
but those kitties were baiting me
so now we're at that
in between space
you smoke a joint
i try to feel out the place
i am a little scared
i am a little anxious

  chorus 1&2
sorry i had to butcher this tree
but those kittens were baiting me

teah - guitars & vocals




four pink walls

four pink walls are closing in
four pink walls of the bathroom stall
and i don't try to
make sense anymore
i don't try to sound nice
cuz they're not listening anyway
and when they hear me they
just think i'm insane
yeah
all i think all that really matters is that
in my own space i am happy
in my own space i am happy

two lovers light a cigarette
under the street lamp
the street is damp
daddy don't you think
i deserve just that
yeah
four pink walls are closing in
four pink walls of the bathroom stall

and i don't care about fucking A's
that's not my trip anyway
all i want is to rip your heart out and
put it on stage
yeah all i want is to
cut you in pieces
and when you laugh
you'll feel all better
all i think all that really matters
is that in my space i am happy
i think all that really matters
is that in my space i am happy

four pink walls of the bathroom stall

teah - drums, slide guitar, guitar & vocals



sky

there's a blonde man
and he's cut down that tree
and that tree now its bleeding
and its blood sings to me
white colour of the waters
and the clouds in the sky
and the sky is
raining on me now
i can't get by without
working through the sky
sky

color of the clouds in the sky
and that blonde man
has cut down that tree
and its blood sings to me
i believe it's raining outside
rain come down purify me
rain come down make me wet
power of rain
make my heart pound
power of the pale sky
make me shine

teah - keyboard, guitar & vocals



Copyright © 1997 Teah Benkoczy, All Rights Reserved.


 
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